THE UNIVERSAL MALE PROBLEM: FINDING SELF-SUFFICIENCY

I remember growing up a little boy. I had no cares whatsoever. My parents were around and I was fine. There was going to be food at the proper time, I wasn’t worried about my school fees: it was all perfect. Then I began to grow up and it began to dawn on me that I had to prepare myself to handle responsibilities. Graduating from the university was exciting but along with it came the realization that, from that moment onward, I was on my own. I had to figure out how to become self-sufficient, not just financially but also mentally and emotionally. I couldn’t be seen as a fool in any way. I thought that was the worst of it all till I became a husband and a father and I realized that self-sufficiency wasn’t going to cut it any longer. I had to now be sufficient for the whole family.

And, that’s how life is for every man. There’s something about manhood that seems to attract greater responsibility, especially in our modern patriarchal society. While females have gained some grounds in current times, we can’t deny the unspoken yet almost deafening reservation in favour of the males. Conversely, we also cannot refute that it demands much in return as well. Uneasy, they say, lies the head that wears the crown. If the man must be honoured, he must be ready for the responsibilities that come with it; and, if he fails to meet up with them, the consequence is humiliation. This societal humiliation is only the beginning of horrors as it becomes the highway to other vices such as crime and even suicide. In third world societies, the situation is worsened by economies that paint a picture of how impossible it is for any individual to rise above mediocrity because of their mediocre education system, lack of jobs, malevolent economic platforms and unrestrained corruption. Have you ever felt this way before: burdened by this sense of insufficiency and inability because nothing you try seems to be working? Maybe you’ve just graduated and you can’t seem to get a job; meanwhile, your family members are waiting for your return with the school fees of your younger siblings. Maybe you’re married with a job but not with enough income to meet up with your family needs. Maybe you have to make a serious decision and you can’t seem to have enough wisdom to choose right. Everyone is looking up to you as the man, waiting for you to make the first move and you can only hope that you don’t fail in the end.

Let me point out here that there’s a need for us to detach ourselves from the pressure that comes from our male-worshipping society. One thing we must first realize is that, whether we are currently meeting our goals or not, we are all humans. Time and chance happen to us all. Rather than making the success of others our standard of success, we should fix our eyes on how appropriately we make use of the time and chance that is given to us.

And this is the purpose of this blog: to guide you into how to make use of the resources around you, whether big or small, to make the most of your life irrespective of whether you’re a single father, a father of six, a grandfather, or a young man just finishing his service year as a Corp member.

Though it’s always advisable to start early in life, irrespective of where you are now, you can find self-sufficiency and learn balance in every aspect of your life. You’ll never be too old or young to learn new hacks to living your best life now. The small seeds you will sow by joining us on this journey from Manhood to Authentic Leadership will ultimately become a forest that will transform your life and that of the generations after you. That’s right! We’ll be building trans-generational structures with our lives and decisions through the content we’ll be sharing on this blog. So, stay tuned.

As I round up here, I would want to personally invite you to join me on the journey from manhood to leadership, a journey that will enable you to find self-sufficiency and teach others to find the same. Sincerely, it’s an honour for me to take you on this journey.

So, here’s what I’d like you to do: make a list of the things you would want to change in your life that will help you achieve sufficiency as a man; things you’d want to learn about that will improve your quality of life. We all have one, no one is perfect. Share these things with us. Our goal is to grow together and what better way to do that than to be open with one another?

See you next time on this blog.